Ha ha! I said digest!
The reason that's funny is because the reason I almost died is because a piece of london broil wedged itself firmly in my windpipe...so there's the irony of having to digest the fact that I damn near died the other night.
If Mister wasn't home, there is no doubt that I'd be a goner. Especially since the only other person present was Daughter and she was just standing there yelling "Mom? Mom?? MOM!?!?!" so the likelihood of her coming to her senses and kicking in to action to save my life was, well, slim to none (in her defense, she was standing there watching me, her mom - who she loves mightily - choking to death so she immediately went into Defcon 1).
Mister, on the other hand, doesn't panic. He simply responds accordingly to emergency situations and gets the job done. One minute I'm freaking out, the next minute he's performing the Heimlich maneuver on me and the minute after that he's back to eating his dinner.
Scary stuff.
I do not ever want to ever again have the thought in my head that "this is it" like I did the other night (unless I'm in my 90s...then it might be okay).
I really thought it was.
And I distinctly remember feeling mad on top of the terror I was experiencing, like: this can't be it! I've still got way too much to do...still have Mister and Daughter to give love to.
And on that note....POP!...Mister Heimlich'd me and saved my life.
(You can imagine the things that have been suggested as a way of repaying him for this...but let's just not go there.)
I was posting about this whole thing on Facebook and a friend said that he had to give himself the Heimlich maneuver one time. This completely freaks me out. Had I been alone the other night I would be dead right now, without question, because I was in TPM (Total Panic Mode) which basically renders you unable to anything except...panic.
So I want you to click here and read about what you're supposed to do if you are alone and choking on something. If you read about it it will probably stick in your mind and maybe you'll remember it if God forbid you ever find yourself in the situation.
Because I know you're like me and you still have stuff to do and people to love.
Note: If you're chewing something and you find yourself wondering if what you're chewing might be too big to swallow, it probably is. Do not swallow whatever it is. Politely remove it from your mouth and proceed to take human bites from that point on.
